Friday, December 4, 2009

Darth Vadar Shoes

I am now the proud owner of two pairs of Darth Vadar shoes.

You may wonder why anyone (other than Darth Vadar) would want Darth Vadar shoes. Sometimes I wonder, too.

However, faithful readers will remember my difficulties finding footwear (described here). The humiliation of being laughed out of every shoe store in town... I can't go on. It's too horrible.

So I've tried to get used to being a Little Old Lady in Tennis Shoes. Except that they are running shoes not tennis shoes. And I'm not that old. I'm not!!!

Now a Little Old Lady in Tennis Shoes is a vulnerable person. People ask her if she needs help lifting her turkey out of the frozen food bin. I don't, thank you very much. I'm just looking for one larger than 20 pounds. People tell her not to worry and reassure her that they won't knock her over as they push ahead at the yogurt display. You bet your sweet life you won't knock me over. And what exactly are you going to do with those eight one-quart containers of Dannon Low Fat Vanilla yogurt? (Ok, so I didn't say that, but I thought it.)

Now nobody messes with Darth Vadar. Except Luke Skywalker and Princess Leia, and they are in a galaxy far, far away.

So if I have Darth Vadar shoes, nobody will mess with me. Brilliant! Because I do have two pairs of Darth Vadar shoes, as shown above.

And these shoes will be good travel shoes. Although they're not exactly glamorous (or at all lovely, except perhaps to Darth Vadar's inamorata), from a distance they look a little less like sneakers than the mostly white-colored shoes. And with another four months to perfect my Spanish, no one, not a single person, in Madrid will know I'm a tourist when I'm wearing these shoes.

Note to shoe shoppers: I ordered these from Endless Shoes since nothing in the right size was available locally. They had the best online prices and free shipping and free returns. I mean free overnight shipping. They arrived less than 24 hours after I ordered them.


pam T said...

darth vadar shoes or not, you are a hoot, Marty. and who cares, as long as you are comfie in said shoes, and you can defend yourself!!! especially at the yogurt counter!!! LOL...

Robin said...

I adore this hilarious story and the way you told it, Marty!!! Yup, I too have Darth Vadar shoes (actually they are Finn Comfort oxfords), which I love and (more importantly) which my feet love. Haven't noticed a single person messing with me since I started wearing them and nobody offered to lift the turkey for me either!