Wednesday, March 10, 2010

If You Want to Be An Athlete,

don't get glasses like mind. I really like these glasses. They're very lightweight. They're rimless so they don't block my face.

But they've broken three times in the past year. Last spring it was the left earpiece. That was replaced. During the summer, it was the bridge. That was replaced. This morning it was the right earpiece. That was replaced with an almost matching one the optician had in stock. A matching earpiece should come in tomorrow.

You may wonder how an ordinary grandma who closely resembles a little old lady would break her glasses so many times. I wondered that, too. And then I realized...

It's my athletic career. I play contact sports. Hockey. Soccer. Football. Hide and Seek. With my grandsons, ages 8 and 6.

The first incident occurred last May when we were playing soccer in the backyard. I was in goal and the only member of my team, playing against the two boys. My older grandson moved the ball down the field while my younger grandson distracted me. My older grandson gave a powerful kick. Blam! Right in my face! Who would believe that someone with my amazingly fast grandma reaction time could get hit in the face? It was an athletic anomaly.

When I went in to get my glasses adjusted a couple of weeks later, the earpiece broke. My excellent and extremely cheerful optician Mr. Steve replaced the earpiece while I wondered how in the world I could have broken it.

Fast forward two months. One Friday evening the bridge of my glasses broke. Just broke. I dug through the drawer to find my substitute glasses. There were two pairs of old glasses. I couldn't see very well with either of them. For sure I couldn't see any needles, thread or beads. It wasn't my favorite weekend. On Monday I trooped back down to see Mr. Steve.

"How could this have happened?" I asked him. He smiled and ordered another bridge. Within a couple of days, I was ready to start beading again.

Then one day last fall, I had a thought. Could the broken glasses have anything to do with getting hit in the face--in the glasses--with the soccer ball? Duh! Double duh!!

And then the right earpiece broke today. This time I knew why. It was hockey. Or maybe football. Or maybe hockey and football.

This past weekend my grandsons and I were playing hockey. We play in the basement (no ice and no skates) with a wiffle ball and plastic hockey sticks about two feet long. Our hockey games do get exciting. We were scrambling after the puck (wiffle ball) in front of the net when Blam! A hockey stick right in my face. Er, right in the glasses. No harm done; no goal scored. But I realized I'd need my glasses adjusted. Later we played football outside, with a football smaller than a grapefruit. But my amazingly fast grandma reaction time let me down again. Blam! A football right in the glasses. No harm done; no touchdown. But the glasses really needed to be adjusted.

So this morning I went back to see Mr. Steve. And after the glasses had been adjusted and cleaned and I was putting them on, Snap! The right earpiece. I am now nicely dressed in glasses that are silver on one side and bronze on the other. But I can see.

And I'm not going to give up my athletic career. I'm just going to speed up my grandma reaction time.


Carol said...

Great post. That's pretty much how my husbands "unbreakable" glasses got broke!

Lisa Criswell / Indigo's Beads said... post! i chuckled throughout. keep up the sports!

Rebecca said...

Perhaps you need a separate pair of sports glasses?

Barbara said...

I romp with my grandkiddies too, so I guess I'm glad I didn't get these glasses a couple months ago. I liked them so much while trying some on for size, and the extremely lightweight quality is especially appealing, but I ended up with the usual granny bifocals in frames. I'm thinking perhaps they will survive my grandkids better after reading your post. I enjoyed it a lot!